the last 36 hours

I've been thinking all day that I wanted to blog, but I just didn't know what to say, or how to say it. I'm afraid that my measly words will somehow diminish what is going on in the communities around us. The last 36 hours have been life changing. My prayer is, and will remain, to God be the Glory.

I want to just share about my day. I think it will help to share while the details are fresh in my mind, although I can't imagine me forgetting them. Our morning started off as usual. Levi got on the bus to go to school and Maggie and I had breakfast. I had a list "Friday errands" but only one important one...I needed to get diapers for Maggie. I got my morning call from Gretchen and we both chatted about how the approaching storms were worrying us. We teased that both of us wanted to keep the boys home from school, but our husbands wouldn't let us. ;) Maggie and I ran to Sam's and got diapers and then headed back home for lunch. We got inside just before the rain started. I went ahead and put her down for an early nap because the severe storms were supposed to move into the area around 2. Around 1 pm, I was watching the weather updates and I started to get a little nervous and debated on whether or not I should go get Levi from school. I decided to wait it out. My neighbor, Natalie, called at 2:20 and said she and the girls were coming to our basement. It was getting dark outside and very, very calm. I had no idea if Levi was going to be held at school or if he would be home on the bus. She got to my house at 2:30 and said news reports stated that tornado activity was approaching Henryville and due to hit in 30 minutes. At this point, I couldn't breathe. My phone started blowing up with texts. My Dad got called out with the police and was monitoring the radio. He told me storms were approaching my house and Henryville. He was concerned about Levi. Natalie got a text from a kindergarten teacher and she told us the buses left early. I got in the van and took off for the bus stop while Natalie took Maggie and her girls to the basement. It was 2:45. The bus usually arrived at 3:12. The next 15 minutes were THE longest 15 minutes in my life. I saw the lights at the end of the street and I just prayed over and over that Levi was on that bus. When it stopped in front of me and I saw Levi and Hillary get off the bus, I started crying. He was shaking. He was so scared. He didn't understand what was happening. The rain started and it was picking up. I looked at the clock and it was 3:00. We raced back up the hill, hurried inside and got downstairs. I kept reassuring him that everything was going to be okay. We hunkered down in the only room without windows in our basement and my head was spinning. The wind was crazy! My Dad and Eric were both texting me. It was 3:08 and my Dad said there was a tornado that just hit Henryville. At 3:11, he sent another one saying there were sightings on the ground two streets over from my house, and one headed towards Borden and one in Memphis. We waited. The sun came out briefly and then round two hit. We got back in our little hiding spot and this time, hail sounded like it was going to break the wall down. Eventually, it passed, too. And the sun reappeared. Eric got home and I felt 100 pounds of weight lift from my shoulders. I knew if he was home, then we must be through the worst of it. As we started watching coverage, we realized how bad the damage was. The good thing was that the storms were breaking up and moving out of the area, but the devastation it left behind rendered me speechless.

Levi's school was destroyed. The footage of homes, churches, businesses that were also destroyed was terrible. I felt absolutely helpless for those around me. I wondered why we survived. And I sat there, listening to Levi's questions and just did the only thing that felt right in that moment...I held him close and told him how much God loved us and that there were going to be lots of people that needed our help in the near future. He was so concerned about his school. He asked me several times if his teachers were dead. He asked about his classmates. He was worried about his Papa being out there helping people. He was worried we would have to go back to the basement. He slept with us last night and was very restless. He kept waking up scared, still asking about his teachers. At one point, he woke up and said "Mom, I think 65 is shut down..." and rolled over and went back to sleep. Poor little guy! Even his dreams were consumed with the happenings of the day. :(

This morning, I opened my eyes, and just started crying. It was as if yesterday just caught up with me over night. My sister's friend lost her home. My brother lost a friend/co-worker. Tonight at dinner, my dad shared story after story of people's homes that looked like they were twisted into pretzels. He said it looked like an atomic bomb went off in some of the towns. As I drove home, I saw semi's and trailers with emergency equipment and supplies parked all over our town. I've received numerous emails from church members and staff and friends on Facebook are posting their stories...and even in the midst of a horrible, horrible day, there were stories of God's grace. Love. Courage. Over and over, I see people wanting to help. A community coming together to help one another. Churches rising up. And, my prayer remains...to God be the Glory.